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Ogres Attack?
It was another standard Britannian day in Vesper. Clear skies, warm weather, a cool breeze. Yeah, boring. I'm a warrior here people, not some little happy happy ring around the flowers peaceful guy! Minax may have been a curse on us, but I swear, I never had as much fun rippin' up critters! 

I had all but given up on anything happening when that wonderful blue and green clad fellow we all know and love called the town crier started spouting off about an ogre camp up by the moongate. Ogres? Couldn't it have been dragons or something? I guess I couldn't complain, a fight's a fight. As long as it wasn't mongbats. Yon town crier mentioned something about a Sir Reuben at the Ore of Vesper, so I mosied my way on over. 

Reuben was a well dressed fellow, I must say. Matching copper platemail, a blindingly blue cape, and a war hammer bigger than my head. I wasn't really paying attention, but he talked about some ogres doing stuff northwest of there, and how they planned to attack. Something I didn't know would have been helpful. He said he had a mage energize a rock or something and was able to make a moongate directly to the ogres. Alrighty then! 

I tell you all now, I never saw so many ogres. I kept on swinging my trusty broadsword, chopping off a toe here and a head there, but they kept on coming! Reuben joined in some time, and others started coming through the gate and running up to help. As much as I hate to admit it, I needed the help. 

Some time through, Reuben went down. Poor guy. We kept on fighting when the biggest, meanest, ugliest, stupidest ogre I've ever seen showed up. I swung my blade, but it passed right through him like air. An illusion? He was kinda hazy, like watching through heat waves. My fellow ogre slayers were just as confused, until the blasted thing actually spoke! A talking ogre, imagine that. He said a magic man was making him unable to be attacked, and the magic man wasn't happy about the ogres dying. Guess big ugly was an illusion, I know that much about magical stuff. 

Sure enough, one of them blasted mages showed up. He died pretty quick, not sure if the fool even got off a spell. The ogre snapped into view. I recognized him as a lord, now. I swung at him again, but he was pretty fast. The ogre just disappeared in front of my eyes, then. Guess he was some sort of mage himself. 

By that time, we had the battle under control. There were stinky ogre corpses everywhere, and the ones still alive were starting to run. Riches abounded from the slain stupids, but I didn't want any. Who needs gold and gems? Right now, I want to get some food. Ogre steaks, anyone?

Published: August 2000
Please Note: Some dates are estimates as exact dates were unavailable.
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